That's me!
Some of you are probably thinking how ironic it is that I
feel like I am actually able to give some parenting advice since I myself have
no children. However, for some reason, children have always been around me.
From starting to babysit at age 12 through high school and even college, to my
first job out of college and my current positions at school and at church,
somehow, I have found myself around kids.
Throughout the last 13 years I have been around lots of kids
and I have come to the realization that when you boil everything down, children
need one main thing: CONSISTENCY
I understand that people may argue there are more important
things kids need like love, discipline, structure, Christian values, parent
involvement, etc., but all of these things mean nothing without consistency.
Here are some of my thoughts and concerns about this situation and why I feel
consistency needs to be implemented in every aspect of life when raising a child.
Discipline
I have learned that discipline has zero effect on a child
unless it is followed through. Once a kid knows they can sway you to do what
they want, or to “undo” a punishment, you are a goner. Empty threats to a child
are one of the worst things you can do in regards to discipline. Following
through with discipline will create less arguments and better behavior. The
trick is to make sure the warning/threat you are implementing to your child is
something that matches the crime (meaning: make it relevant, and don’t give a
punishment during anger). This consistency needs to be used both at home and in
the classroom.
Christian values
Nothing bothers me more than to see Christian parents
raising their children and then not attend church regularly. Church is the one
place we can come together to encourage each other and fulfill our important
purpose on the Earth (Hebrews 10:25). I think of all the repercussions of
things like irregular church attendance, not teaching your child how to tithe
and handle money, and not implementing Christian values consistently. I can’t
do anything but assume that if the family does not see these things as high
importance now, the child will grow up and continue to not see these things as
important.
Parent involvement, love, gushy gushy stuff
And then you have the part where you are just being around
your kids when they are being kids. I have seen teen after teen strive for
their parents’ attention and constantly get rejected. It’s so sad to me that so
many parents are not able to put some kind of focus on their kids. Too many
kids have learned to have to grow up far beyond their age in order to take care
of themselves, other siblings, or sometimes even their parents. Though this seems a bit extreme, it’s everywhere, and all I wish is that parents see the
value of raising their children appropriately, giving them lots of love and
discipline, as well as showing them the importance in life.
While I would love to say that if all of these things are
implemented, you will raise the perfect child, I am absolutely scared to death
that I know this isn't true. You eventually have to release them from your arms
and pray to God that they make the right decisions. Without even having a kid
of my own, I cannot imagine the struggle that would be. Raising children scares
the crap out of me but I’m looking forward to it every day.
That's My Life at Current
